Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Psst...have you seen him?

It has been a little over an year now, and I haven't had even an itzy-bitzy-teeny-weeny crush on someone. I know its not a big deal for most, but for me, who survives on romance, its a big deal. Its been ages since I last found myself sighing and day-dreaming, longing, imagining etcetera.
Maybe its just growing up, leaving the inebriating teenage behind. But its surprising nonetheless, since I even joined NSIT in August last year,a place overflowing with guys and hopefully most with an above average intellect. But so far, abso-fuckin'-lutely NOONE has turned me on...intellectually. Yes, they are all JEE crackers and CEE winners,but the sheer ability to rote and quote does not qualify them, or anyone for that matter, as intellectuals. I doubt the fact I could have found a better bet in the IITs, a place I well-nigh abnegated for being in NSIT.
The big sad part is that I am at least two years behind (due to late admission+one year droppie) and it virtually makes me feel I'm stuck with kids of different shapes and sizes. Maybe thats the reason I am always eying the seniors, much to my disappointment there too. I am like desperately searching for a 'man' in the whole of NSIT for one harmless reason of "being good friends with" ( not for tying the knot or anything,please DO NOT misinterpret my interest in you...for Crissake!!) as in a perfectly platonic relationship. But it seems convincing Mayawati to retire from politics would've been an easier task.
What is a 'man' to me? If mother nature is not in the mood to play with your X and Y you can be a consummate male biologically. I am not doubting anyone's sexual abilities here, I'm not even remotely interested in that, so if I say I am not able to find a 'man' I mean it completely in the non-physical, non-biological and non-chemical sense (Your testosterone secretions don't interest me.).
He is someone with strong opinions, even if they are different from mine, a person who can stand up for himself. I do not imply standing up and hitting someone with his fist, but he is able to present his individuality without insulting or undermining the opinions of others. He has a strong personality and his presence alone makes an impact. He doesn't have to shout, but people listen to him. He is modern, yet has strong ethics, mainly the respect for women; Basically a certain degree of respect for everyone, old or young. He should not feel the need to lie because he knows his actions aren't wrong. He is excellent at whatever he does, knows how to talk his mind.His ego should be under his control ( a rare quality which even I am trying to acquire). He should be someone I can look up to.
Hm mm. Difficult to find certainly. Okay why only a guy and not a girl? Number one. I get along with guys better, they are more translucent (if not transparent). Many girls get along with me, but I get along with few girls. The fact that I hate to gossip drastically reduces my chances of having a good female friend. Number two. I already know a few girls who are amazing and are very good friends of mine. I shouldn't be asking for more.
So far there has been no success. Just false alarms of diamonds shining but getting closer I discover it was just a piece of broken mirror reflecting light. I am not giving up- its against my nature. I am consoling myself by thinking it will take more time and patience to find such a guy, probably he is camouflaged amongst the non intellectuals and it will take time to peel off the layers of disguise. I hope there is at least one such man.. and that I find him soon. :)

18 comments:

uru said...

You surely will..or perhaps it would be easier that 'he' finds you! Interesting post, to say the 'least' ..;-)
Keep writing...Muaah! ;-)

anisha said...

You wud definitely rise in my eyes if u wud want me too,
but,that wud make another girlfriend added to ur list:)

class apart said...

well... an observer like you has more chance of spotting "him"... than anybody else... its not that things are far away,, its just like holding a binocular other way round.. making nearby things appear faraway...

Manee said...

@uru
thanks...hoping for the best :)

@anisha

:) well I never mind girlfriends,[;)] if they are good, nothing can be better!
coz the girls who care to think, think deep.Always.

@Class apart

:)
yes I know I have you...but you can't be here with me in NSIT (tangibly) all the time and so I really do need a good frend...despite having an awesome sweetheart as you :)

furor said...

plenty of people around .... how often do you give anyone a proper chance.

You must also realize that you're looking in the wrong place.

"Schooling" and "education" are not the same. There are people who spend their lives getting "schooled" and those who go out and try to acquire an "education".

Most of the guys you talk to would be bumbling idiots outside a classroom with no sense of how to articulate anything. That ... takes education.

Try lowering your eyes and look in the real world ... there are plenty of "under-achievers" who would surprise you.

anks said...

you are under estimating your seniors way too much or over estimating your self, or may be both, in this "quest-for-a-man"...

Manee said...

@furor
Firstly, Im pleasantly surprised to see your comment.. I honestly wasn't expecting it. :)

Secondly, I totally agree with you that 'schooling' and 'education' have little to do with each other, if anything at all. I have mentioned it in my post too; Rote and quote can make you intelligent but not an intellectual. Plus I have been looking for quite a while now...and its just my luck which will decide when I'd find him, in case I'm destined to.
Its only that now the void seems intolerable and I feel lonely among so many people in the college. That is why the search has hit desperation levels.

Anyways, I'm not underestimating anyone, be it under-achievers, because of all the people I know, I myself most strongly believe in the notion of "There is always a lot more to what meets the eye."

Thanks once again for your comment :)

Manee said...

@anks

Thanks for commenting.

And its certainly not the latter; I'm not even talking about me being superior anywhere. Its just that unfortunately I'm designed to be finicky, which more often than not creates more problems for me than it solves, one of them being this "quest-for-a-man".

I cannot underestimate or overestimate anyone without knowing him. Its only natural that I have little access to seniors beyond the pro forma salutation.


P.S : BTW, Are you my senior in NSIT?

Prachi said...

*sympathetic pat* I have always been rather unlucky regarding the people I like.A few days back, I was watching American Idol, and I was struck by a certain 26-yr old. He is moderately cute, but REALLY charming, and it was mainly his voice, that planted the seeds of a mini-crush in me. Guess what? He's gay. Apparently. Knowing my luck, it's a certainty.

Btw loved this: the girls who care to think, think deep.Always.


:))

Xtr0 said...

Intellect and intelligence are 2 different and unrelated things. A person is intelligent does not necessarily mean that the same person is cognitive of the surroundings, and more importantly, of his/her own self. Intelligent people might learn fast, but the question remains, do they want to learn anything that is not being taught?

An even more important question is, do they question the path they are led to, while being made a "good" engineer (or any other profession for that matter)?. Depending on a person's self-awareness, he/she develops a sense of conviction in his/her beliefs. This is the first stage of cognition. The second stage is that the person does not try to impose them on others, lest they ask for his/her counsel, and even then, the onus being on advising and not forcing.

You might have met a few people from college, but first of all, you "really" don't know them. Secondly, you still haven't come across around 90 percent of the college population, which is why your search becomes futile. Given the distances between the first year people and say, the third year people seem almost unconquerable, since they are busy with their friend groups. This increases even more in the fourth year, myself being a fourth year guy. By this time, their are so many groups, that people hardly bother to care about even their classmates, let alone they search for people in other branches and batches to find out how the person is, lest their is some work required of them.

So, there you go. I've said enough already. Have fun.

Xtr0 said...

However, one point that I forgot to mention in my seemingly unending post is that when you are making friends, do not view them from a narrow perspective. But I guess you know that already.

roopam poddar said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
i dont think therefore i am safe...lol said...

k, the first thing that I realize is that you are too much grown up....
mann...phew
I'll tell you why u havent met your man .....u have a 16 GHZ brain always working on 100% CPU capacity( u think too much!!!),
just try to chill out a little bit, I mean I am a hostler, I know people who have a crush on you ( i mean how does it matter to you ..lol)...not exactly you but your peom...u see that's the whole point.
best of luck with your mission 'i-man-ginary' neways

nameless said...

I am guessing I am too late in asking you out

Manee said...

@nameless

Maybe. Maybe not.

nameless said...

@Manee..
The thing is you probably don't even know me, and I am just a long time follower of your blog & YKA posts.
I didn't knew you moved to OSU, and had no idea you were here in the bay area for the summer.

Manee said...

FWIW, I am joining a company in Bay Area after graduation.

nameless said...

awesome! @walmartlabs? lemme know whenever you are around..